Understanding control..and letting go.

Loosing control, is that possible? What is worth controlling and what isn't? This is one of the biggest battles of my life. Loosing control, how can I? Today, I was given the "homework" of differentiating between what is in my control and what isn't. It seems simple, right? Well, it is until you realize what you can't control and then accept it, let go of it, and no longer be affected by it. In a way, you are freeing yourself from the unnecessary burden of others reactions that you cannot control. I now know, I cannot control how my relationships with others will go. All I can control in a relationship is what I contribute and how I treat others. BUT, and this is a big but, NOTHING I do will stop that person from "changing", nothing. I need to accept that I can't control everything and not everything happens because of something I did or didn't do. Alhamdulillah, this realization and acceptance is very liberating. I feel like a huge weight has been taken off my shoulder, true relief. I have to stop trying to control everything and by doing so, I must let go. I realized that my relationship and faith in Allah is the only thing that keeps me going many times. I wanted to list things I realized I can control and things I can't just so I can see it written.

I CAN control...

• Who I allow i my life
• Who I choose to have relationships (friends) with
• How I treat others
• How I allow others to treat me

I CANNOT control

• People who decide to leave
• Keeping a relationship going
•  Constantly communicating to avoid disconnection
• How some people see or understand a situation

These are just some of the things that are the most burdensome on me, and Insha'allah I will no longer let these things control me or limit me in any way. I will be free, Insha'allah. I will allow others to be and decide as they please, knowing it isn't always against me.