Allah does NOT love complainers, He loves prayers.

A while back a very close friend of mine brought to my attention a bad habit I had, Complaining. She gave me some really good advise and said somethings that really stood out to me. She said :" Allah does NOT like complainers because they have forgotten that he is in charge." Astagfar Allah that was not my intention of complaining, some people become so used to complaining that they don't even notice that they are complaining which was my case. I just did it but never thought of it. When someone complains alot it's not the person they are complaining about but it's actually them. They have been wronging their soul for so long, their complains is really them needing to pay attention to themselves not the person they are complaining about. 

 Allah said: We will test you with a certain amount of fear and hunger and loss of wealth and life and fruits. But give good news to the steadfast: (Qur'an, 2:155)

You might be complaining about somethiong Allah is testing you in and sometimes he tests you in things to make room for something even better.

One of my favorite Ayahs from the Quran :

Or did you suppose that you would enter the Garden without facing the same as those who came before you? Poverty and illness afflicted them and they were shaken to the point that the Messenger and those who believed with him said, 'When is Allah's help coming?' Be assured that Allah's help is very near. (Qur'an, 2:214)

Allah's help is ALWAYS near, Allah tests those that he loves so they can become closer to him in the end Insha'allah.

I have developed a new habit and that is turning to Allah when I feel helpless, frusterated, sad, or even happy and excited because you can't only remember Allah in the bad times and forget him in the good.It doesn't work that way.

We must also always remember  

       “And whatever strikes you of disaster—it is for what your hands have earned; but He pardons much” (Qur’an, 42:30). 

Maybe you did something you shouldn't have, or maybe Allah wants you to grow more. I can go on and on but one thing to remember that EVERYTHING has a purpose, we might not see it all the time but with patience and awareness Allah will open our heart and eyes for us to be able to recognise it and remember Him.

 I was once going through a very tough time not understanding what could possibly be the reason for what had happened to me and read this :

“When Allah tests you, it is never to destroy you. Whenever He removes something from your possession, it is only to empty your hands for an even better gift.” ~ By Ibn al-Qayyim rahimahu Allah (may Allah have mercy on him)

SubhanAllah what a beautiful way to look at something, right?

We must always keep in mind that Allah has our best interest and if we want to succeed in this life and the hereafter, we must listen well to what he is telling us. Starting with the first word Read.

So my advise is STOP complaining and starting praying, for Allah listens to every prayer as He says in the Holy Quran :

"When My servants ask thee concerning Me,

I am, indeed, close (to them): I listen

to the prayer of every supplicant when he

calleth on Me. Let them also, with a will,

listen to My call, and believe in Me, that

they may walk in the right path."

(Q. 22: 186)

Alhamdullilah it feels good to vent!

I have noticed since posting on my blog I have been more peaceful and less annoyed by people and life circumstances. I think it's because writing is a way of venting for me and also telling my story to people that don't know me is nice. Alhamdulillah I have found my way of venting because breaking plates can get expansive, haha just kidding.

Life is Short! But when will we actually GET that??

How can you stand up to a bully?

Has someone been bullying you for so long you don't know how to get out of it? Do you feel like your in too deep to do anything about it? What step should you take? How should you break free?

This is my dilemma, I don't know the answers to any of these because I am trying to figure it out myself. Do I have the strength? They say things always get worse before it gets better, it's even true with acne medication. The doctors or sales rep. always tell you when you get a new acne medication that bit will get much worse before you starts seeing results, but why? Is it because the bully wants to see if he can scare so you'll give up? The other issue is the consequences that you'll face if the person is in control of anything that is essential in your life, that makes it more risky and complicated. Maybe that's why some countries always play nice and are limited to what they can do with another country that trades good with them, the risk of not is too big. At some point it doesn't matter anymore, you don't care what this person has you've had enough. I don't know if I'm at that point and honestly I don;t think I can handle the consequences of standing up to my bully but I guess it's good to know that everything in it's own time will happen. I pray to Allah in this blessed month that I will be able to make my life less complicated and eliminate people that are doing me more harm than good. Ameen. It always helps me to know that nothing lasts forever :)

Sorting my thoughts

When I started this blog I had so much I wanted to write about and now all those ideas are gone, I just went blank but Insha'allah once school is settled and Ramadan is finished I will regain my sanity and be able to write more posts. Insha'allah you all are enjoying these last days of Ramadan, I am aiming to finish my goal of reading the whole Qur'an and right now I am at Surat Al Ahzab. It feels like a long way to go and very little time left but I know I can do it. I hope everyone else is able to accomplish what they wanted to this Ramadan, I got to say I am very sad it's almost over but I have gained so much this month and accomplished things I thought I couldn't

A cup of coffee

One of my dear friends invited me and my siblings over for iftar yesterday, as usual we were late! Driving around last minute to find some good pastry to take with us. Finally 5 minutes before iftar we get a cake, once the lady said mocha and cream cheese I was sold. We finally arrive at my friends house and apologize for being late but she is always so forgiving. Once we finished eating we watched one of Ramadan's special T.V shows (as if I needed another one) and decide to learn how to dance Dabkeh! I love the tradition and culture of Dabkeh but have never learned how :-/

After some cake and a cup of coffee we were doing Dabkeh in her apartment, I felt a bit physically impaired not being able to get the moves but I was persistent. Coffee makes me happy for no reason and being with my friends and family just made me even more happier, I felt like I could do anything! I was looking forward to college this fall, I wanted to get a new hair cut, and just do anything and everything. We went home at 1:00 a.m. and I asked my sister to give me a hair cut, don't worry she is a professional. The haircut gave me a new look I was looking for and made me even more happier; coffee hasn't worn off yet. After that I decided to take a shower and catch up on one of my goals, finishing the Quran this month. I was feeling so behind and decided to stay up till fajr, yes I know coffee does wonders to me hehehe. I was on a roll, the more I read the better I felt. My dad wanted to have suhoor at 3:30 a.m. so I took a break to sit with the family. I continued and couldn't anymore after 4:40 a.m. decided to take snooze on the couch so I don't miss fajr.

What a great day, night and beginning of another day, right? I had an amazing time with my friend, got a new look that I needed so bad, and read to Surat Al Nisa'! I felt like I have nourished my body, soul and spirit. I now feel like giving up my shows is no big deal and procrastination looks evil. I woke up at 12:30 energetic! I don't know if I can keep up being awake till 6:00 a.m. but it works for now.To think it all started from a cup of coffee.

Procrastinating procrastination this month..

I am a professional procrastinator, if people could do it for a living I would be the best in the business. One of my goals for Ramadan is to read the entire Quran, I am off to a late start. I am still in Surat Al-Baqarah (The Cow) and college will be starting on the 22nd which means even less time. As any professional procrastinator would do I have excuses, but that's all it ever is excuses!! Ok maybe I'm exaggerating a bit but still I'm tired of excuses. So another goal for this month was to stop procrastinating the important things I must do. Another goal was to only watch one T.V. show (My Turkish show that I love) but that doesn't come on T.V. so I have substituted it with more that one show. In my defense no one show can make up for my old one. I'm a bit behind but Insha'allah I plan on catching up, as long as I am not in denial I should be fine, right?

I have another dilemma, I can't adjust to a sleep schedule this month. I have too much to do during the day and I don't want to drink coffee to stay up all night but what choice to I have? Any Suggestions? How are you managing your time this month? I could really use some help.

Jazakum Allahu Khairan :)

You Came to Me

I find this to be a very uplifting song when I am down to remind me what is really important and were my focus should be, Alhamdulillah :)

Loving someone more than they love you

I have found myself in this position, no it's not a guy. I treasure the blessings Allah has given me, my family, and friends as well. I take the people that are in my life very seriously and I don't hold back to let them know and show them that I love them and I'm grateful to have them in my life. The saying I have in mind is in Arabic but it is somewhere along the lines of :" A true friend is there in the time of hardship". Well, I have realised some of the most dearest people in my life have shown me their true colors, they don't care for me as much a I do for them. OUCH! I know, I haven't been able to fully cope with it or even comprehend it that well yet. How could this be? What do you do? I can't stop loving them but the thought that they don't love me as much is really painful. I would do anything for them but I don't think, actually I know they wouldn't do the same. I'm gonna leave you all with that and have the quotes below do the rest of the talking.

"You have to get hurt. That’s how you learn. The strongest people out there, the ones who laugh the hardest with a genuine smile, those are the people who have fought the toughest battles. Because they’ve decided they’re not going to let anything hold them down, they’re showing the world who’s the boss."

"After a while, you learn that you don’t need anyone else in order to survive. No one is ever going to always be there, no matter what they say or what they promise. You just gotta suck it up, accept it and keep moving on."

"These things happen. What other people say doesn’t change the way you are. Rememberwhat we always say? It’s just part of the journey. Life isn’t about what happens to you, it’s about how you handle what happens."

"Have you ever thought that if one thing hadn’t happened, a whole set of things never would’ve either? Like dominoes, a single event kicked off an unstoppable series of changes that gained momentum and spun out of control, and nothing was ever the same again. Don’t ever doubt that a mere second can change your life forever."

"There is no person in the world who is made to handle every punch that’s thrown at them. we aren’t made that way. in fact, we’re made to get mad, upset, sad, be hurt, stumble and fall. we weren’t supposed to be able to handle everything, but that’s what makes us stronger in the end, by learning from the things that hurt us the most."

"In your life, you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some, you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do."

My favorite one is this :

"In life God doesn’t give you the people you want, instead He gives you the people you need. To teach you, to hurt you, to love you, and make you exactly the way you should be."

The words of a Muslim Poet

Asalamu Alaikum Everyone,

Recently I have been listening to Boonaa Muhammed's poetry and Masha'allah he is really good! I probably have listen to almost everyone he has on YouTube but the one that is stuck in my head is Beautiful. The way he talks about the difference between a girl/women that is modest and one that isn't is just well, Beautiful. I think most girls can agree that we love to be appreciated and complimented in a polite and proper way. Listening to how the western compliment a girl they hardly ever mention anything about courage, smart, modesty, and true beauty; inner beauty as well as outer beauty.

I always see this young girl that has make-up on every time and short shorts, her hair is always straight to a point that I thought it was naturally straight. I complimented her hair cut and she told me that her hair is actually naturally very curly and she straightens it EVERYDAY! I am a low maintenance kind of girl so that sounds like a lot to me and it would be pointless to stainghten my hair knowing my hijab will cause my hair to become wavy again. I asked her how old is she and she knocked my hijab off when she told me she was only ELEVEN years old! Once she said that I felt like my mind just took me nine years back when I was eleven and what I was doing then. I didn't know what make-up was, I didn't wear any short clothes and I most certainly didn't straighten my hair. BTW her mom is a Muslim convert.I guess I am a little more old school than most people. I know I got a bit side tracked from the poem but my point is I think this girl most have been influenced by the music to think that her outer appearance is true beauty. I noticed  nowadays the kid songs is actually the adult songs but kids singing them instead. I pray may Allah give this young girl guidance and insight to be able to see what true beauty really is.

Anyway, may Allah bless our Ummah with more Muslim men like Boonaa Muhammed. Ameen

Why do people give hints..

Why do people give hints when they can just say what they really mean?

 I hate hints, I don't get them and in the end when the bomb is dropped I feel stupid! How could I not see this coming? How could I have no clue? This has happened to me so many times and I can't help but wonder, do I really want to get the hints? If I start reading in to what people ACTUALLY mean then I am starting to doubt what the person is saying and could read into it too much or misunderstand. All and all it's confusing!

Prophet Muhammed said:  “Leave that which makes you doubt for that which does not make you doubt.”

I have applied this hadith in my problem with taking hints..I don't get it, I will doubt it, so I leave it. Simple, right? But I still haven't figured out what to do in that shocking moment when the person just flat out says it, thinking you were prepared for it and realises from your reaction that you never got the HINTS! I think with time I will be less surprised when this happens and not feel so naive, maybe being naive isn't such a bad thing after all. I can't imagine how much time I would waste if I analysed everything people tell me, not worth it.

So I got into thinking, why do people feel like they need to hint something instead of just saying it?

It could be they don't know how you will react if they didn't warn you first or ease you into it,maybe they don't have the guts to say it so they are actually preparing themselves to say it and not you, it could be they don't think you can handle what they have to say.

I have come to terms with this and when it happens again I don't think it will bother me as much, I am better off being naive. I do like looking back and seeing all the signs I missed. What they don't know is that I can handle it, I always do. I get surprised every time but mostly because I didn't see this coming but if they would've just said it in the beginning I would get it. I realized something about myself, I like things to be plain, simple and clear! Complicated is so overrated and I try very hard to keep it out of my life even though it is inevitable at times.

The Prophet (Peace be upon him) said: “Teach! Make things easy! And do not make things complicated!" He repeated this three times.

I love when things are said straight forward, I hate the guessing game..

But my eyebrows! Oh I give up

In al-Saheeh, it was reported that Ibn Mas'ood (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: "Allaah has cursed the women who do tattoos and those who have this done, the women who pluck eyebrows and those who have this done, and the women who file their teeth and change the creation of Allaah."

The Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wasallam said:
Allah has cursed those women who modify their eyebrows or ask others to do it for them (Sahih al-Bukhari and Muslim).
I recently found myself arguing over this issue, I like to clean the top and bottom of my eyebrows as well as in between but not thinning or shaping (I guess cleaning is somewhat shaping). I once saw this group of Saudi girls and my eyes went straight to their eyebrow! Oh how beautiful their eyebrows looked, so flawless and perfect! As I looked closer it turns out they lighten (bleach) the hair that they dislike to the color of their skin so you can't tell it's there. I was a bit confused and upset. Upset because I thought what they were doing was a bit sneaky and bending the rules, I mean isn't the purpose of not TWEEZING your eyebrows is to accept their shape and not to beautify the look of them for strangers? So my argument was if it's halal to bleach them then why can't I tweeze them? you get the same look, don't you? It just seemed unfair to me. I decided to face my problem instead of ignoring it. My issue became with the Saudi girls approach of lightening since I can't argue with what the Prophet said and it seemed to me as if they found a loop hole "well, we won't pluck our eyebrows but the hadith says nothing about bleaching, right?" I decided to do some research of my own and not do my eyebrows till I came to a conclusion. I stumbled upon this hadith :

The Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wasallam said:
Allah has cursed those women who modify their eyebrows or ask others to do it for them (Sahih al-Bukhari and Muslim).

After reading this I felt great! Since I haven't been tweezing my eyebrows I actually love them, as long as cleaning in between them is ok I'm cool with it. I know this might sound bad but I felt like I WON! True I am not gonna have the look of those flawless eyebrows the Saudi girls have but I don't care anymore.
So I give up!
I give up caring if people think I look ungroomed or if I have a few strays that are really bothering me! When I stand in front of  Allah on the day of judgment I wouldn't be able to blame my action on the Saudi girls or society cause it will be all on ME and only me.
Fighting this issue was exhausting and now that it's over I am at peace, Alhamdulillah :)

Searching for the one...finding balance!

The other day I was just laying down not really wanting to do anything when my sister calls me and she says: " Omg I just sent you a link to this girl's story you have to read it!!", so I did. The story was like a modern day Muslim fairytale! I couldn't stop reading and I really couldn't believe it was a true story. I loved how raw and honest the girl writing the story is and giving all the details us girls love to know haha. My curiosity came to play when she asked a rhetorical question :"Why was it that older folks always lectured young teens and adults that the only way to get your mind off of things like boys was to be more involved in religious stuff?" I don't know why this stood out to me but it got me thinking, why is it? Then I remembered one of my favorite ayahs :
"Truly, it is by the Remembrance of Allah that hearts find rest." [Qur'an, 13.28]
This ayah explains it, plain and simple! When a girl is so caught up in a guy which isn't unusual or with anything else like friends, family, school, work and so on remembering Allah is the solution to all that. Why you ask? Because we get so busy and occupied  that we loose balance and when that happens you begin to freak out and eventually feel lost.
"He has set up the Balance" [Qur'an, 55.5]
So if Allah is the One who sets up balance, then finding balance and regaining it is also with Allah.
For me this story gave me hope and enlightenment as well. You can find a guy that fulfills all your expectations and even more! But you must have PATIENCE! Insha'allah I will cover Patience in this matter in another post. Insha'allah you will also enjoy reading this beautiful story as much as I did.If you'd like to read the story for yourself (a completely halal love story) click here and don't forget to comment and let me know what you think. Peace Out! :)

I like the feel of this!

Asalamu Alaikum Everyone :)

I am excited to start this blog in this blessed month of Ramadan. I am big on reading Muslim blogs and have a few that I like to follow but I was so intrigued by how you create a connection and have somewhat a community of support from people you wouldn't have gotten the chance to interact with normally. I lately have been doing a lot of thinking on my past experiences and what direction my life is heading in. I think Insha'allah with this blog I will be able to learn more about myself and others so please subscribe, comment, and just start a conversation. Bare with me and I think you'll see I have some interesting dilemmas and stories to share.
 Jazakum Allahu Khair,
Yours Truly.....Curious Muslimah :)